Remember back in the day I used to have my web cam aimed at my living room and then later I aimed it at my fish tank? I’ve decided to re-enable it. Presenting my ToiletCam! Now you can watch my toilet 24 hours a day.
Check out the live stream here:
This is why you don’t get a home phone, even if Comcast gives you one for free. I constantly get sales calls from random places. Now it’s extended into random languages too! Have a listen: Voicemail
An Angry Bird is climbing the Space Needle! If you’re a pig and you live in the metropolitan area, run!
The newest Kindle, the Kindle Touch has a cool feature called X-Ray that examines the content of a book and looks for common phrases and people inside that book. Well I turned all my tweets into a book and let XRay run to determine the common things I say. Here’s a screenshot. My favorite is my frequent use of the phrase “Holy crap”:
I’m taking a three day weekend this week to kill this:
Today my dad would have been 57 years old. That’s very weird to think about. It seems so old because in my mind he’s locked into being 46. I wonder if that’s still how I’ll imagine him when I’m 46, or by then will I have artificially aged him in my imagination?
One year (I believe 1986) on Christmas Eve, my dad dressed up as Santa. He knew I was going to immediately go searching for him, either out of suspicion or at least to make sure he didn’t miss Santa. So he made sure it seemed like he was there. How? Here’s how. Take notes all you fathers and future fathers out there, because this is genius:
Step 1: Lock yourself in the bathroom and put on your Santa suit.
Step 2: Get ready to crawl out the bathroom window, leaving the door to the bathroom locked.
Step 3: But before you crawl out, push play on a tape recorder you prepared ahead of time.
A few years ago I copied all the old family audio tapes from cassette to digital form. I was surprised and delighted to find the audio tape from that day in the pile, and I’m going to share it with you now. Listen here:
(Or click here if you don’t see a play button above)
As you can imagine, I was completely fooled.
Take a look at this! I won! If you find a little stack of money over a dollar value, you instantly win that amount!
Click the “Read More below to see some pictures of me cashing in my winnings!
I was playing with my phone and a voice changing app. Here’s the result of my labor:
Killer With Indigestion
I got this voicemail today. Can you understand it? I think I hear the words “stuffed animal” in there somewhere.
Shawn’s Voice Mail.mp3